The Death of the Green Eagle

Dear All,

The death is reported of the GREEN EAGLE at the Ohene Djan sports Stadium on the 03-Feb-08. The body was laid in state at the forecourt of the Fiesta Royale Hotel, North Dworwulu (adjacent to the head offices of Nestle Ghana Ltd), Accra.

According to Doctor’s post mortem report, the GREEN EAGLE died of two teaspoonfuls of goals. It was revealed by doctors that the eagles showed signs of ill-health at the Essipon stadium in Sekondi between 20-Jan-08 and 03-Feb-08 before being flown to Ohene Djan for intensive care, but gave up the ghost after 93 minutes of soccer surgery.

Chief Mourner: Alhaji Umar Musa Yar’adua (Aso Rock, Abuja – Nigeria)

Children: Augustine Eguavon, Stephen Keshi, Rashid Yekini, Garba Lawal, Friday Ekpo, Sunday Oliseh, Sampson Siasia, Emmanuel Amunike, Mitiu Adepoju, Finidi George, Agu Alloy, Amokachie.

Grand Children: Nwanko Kanu, Joseph Yobo, John Utaka, Yakubu Aiyegbeni, Obafemi Martins, Mikel Obi, Nsorfor , Nwaneri, Austin Ejide, Taiwo Taye, Odemwienge, Danny Shittu.

Uncles: Olusegun Obasanjo, Mahamadu Buhari, Abdulsalam Abubakar, Wole Soyinka, Sani Abacha, Ibrahim Badamosi Babangida, Chief Emeka Anyaoku.

IN-LAWS: Dele Momodu, Dr. Adanugu, Clem Ohameze, Kanayo O. Kanayo, Zack Orji, 2Face idibia, John Okafor.

Meanwhile, the BLACK STARS of Ghana were invited to the Osu police station for interrogation in connection with the murder of the Green Eagle. During prosecution at the Accra fast track high court, Captain John Mensah pleaded guilty to the murder charge.

Presenting the case, the bias referee Mohammed Benouza from Algeria( May his sins be forgiven), revealed that he saw Junior Agogo & Michael Essien putting 1 teaspoonful of poisonous dosages of goals each into the cocoa-net of goal keeper Austin Ejide in the 38th & 83rd minutes respectively.

Though the rest of the STARS were acquitted and discharged, Essien & Agogo were sentenced to 1 goal each with surety to appear at the semi final match with Cameroon

Meanwhile, reports reaching us indicates that SOS messages have been sent from Alata to the EAGLES camp that only one member ( Mikel Obi) of the deceased family would be allowed to enter Alata. The rest return at their own risk & danger.

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